207 – How much of your happiness do you actually control?

Hey mama. This is Mama’s Daily Dose, the short, actionable podcast for mamas who want more. I’m Meghan Q Barrett of allyoumama.com. Yesterday, we talked about choosing happiness, and how it is a choice. But I have some news for y’all… ALL of happiness does not come down to a choice. And Mama’s Daily Dose is 50% of your happiness comes from this… let’s get moving before we get interrupted.


Alright, Mama, so there are things in this life that you can control and things in this life that you can’t control. And having kids really exemplifies this, you cannot fully control another human being. As much as you want that kid to listen, you want that kid to follow directions, you learn relatively quickly, that you can’t control them. And one of the keys to happiness is realizing what you can and cannot control. Because if you’re wasting all of your energy on things that you can’t control, that doesn’t really sound super happy to me, I don’t know about you.


50% of your happiness is up to you. That is the good news. About 40% of it is based on your mindset, and how intentional you are with how you want to feel. 10% is based on circumstance. So things that are happening outside of you, but you can control it because you can control your reaction. And then, about 50% is based on genetics. So there are some people out there that are genetically predisposed to being happier. Maybe you’re one of those people, great. Maybe you aren’t. Regardless, you cannot control your genetics. What you can control is how you want to show up what you choose, and how intentional you are. So no, you are not 100% in control of how happy you are. But hey, 50% isn’t too shabby. I mean, if I could control 50% of the traffic or the weather in the world, I mean, that would be pretty sweet. So focus on what you can control. You can choose happiness, you can’t change your genetics. So focus on what you choose.


Mama, your action today is to look at what you have going on for the day. And choose one situation that you are going to go into today and intentionally choose to be happy. No matter what the situation is you are going in there you are bringing the joy and you are going to be happy and remind yourself as you are in that situation. I choose happiness. I choose happiness. And hey, I know you want to be happy. And the best way to do that is to know what actually makes you happy. The one thing I hear from moms all the time is:

“I don’t know who I am…”

“I don’t know what I want to do…”

“I don’t know who I want to be…”

“I don’t know who I am outside of mom.”


And if you are struggling with this, head on over to allyoumama.com And take the free quiz, “I’m a mom now, what the F do I want??” A two minute quiz to get you thinking on what is really going to make you happy. Because if you don’t know what’s gonna make you happy…how do you know what you’re even trying to achieve? So take the quiz today and have a great day free of mama guilt because you deserve it.

Rather listen than read? Listen to the podcast here:

Mama’s Daily Dose

Meghan Q Barrett is Mom Success Coach who helps mamas figure their sh*t out so they can create a life they love as “mom” AND an individual without the mom guilt.

Book your Confident Mama Session

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