64 – “…instead the story has been that children follow their mothers along all day.”

Hey Mama, this is Mama’s Daily Dose. I’m Meghan Q Barrett of allyoumama.com. Hey, it is already Thursday again. And you know what that means it is, quote day. Today’s quote is another quote from CJ Schneider, in her book, Mothers of the Village, “For the larger part of the great motherhood story of humankind, a mother’s days have not been spent following around their children all day. Instead, the story has been that children follow their mothers around all day.” Let’s get moving, before we get interrupted.

Throughout history, and in many other cultures today, most children tend to follow their moms around and what they do all day. You know, if they’re farmers, and they’re working out in the fields, the children are with them. In the hunter gatherer times, the children went out and helped to gather, they would sit at the women’s feet while they knitted. And they would be there while the mothers were cooking. Basically, the kids followed along with what the mothers did; or do today in other cultures. And I’m not sure when this totally switched. But for many moms today, it’s we follow around what the kids are doing. Okay, we’re going to kids soccer practice, okay, now there’s a birthday, now going to school, do you want to go to a farm? Do you want to do this? Do you want to do that? And it’s all about what the kids want to do. And we’re following around what they’re doing, instead of them, following what we’re doing. And so that puts a lot more stress on us to entertain our kids and make sure we’re doing what they want to do, and that they are happy all the time doing the activities that they want. And it just adds all this extra stress. 

And then it’s like, when can we do the things that we want to do or that we need to get done? And, you know, we do need to keep our kids happy. I mean, I know that my kids would not be happy, following me around doing all the things that I need to do. And sitting next to me right now while I record this podcast, but I think there needs to be more of a balance instead of all this focus on the kids activities, and we need to get them back to seeing what we need. And what we want to do too. We need to look at some activities that are ours, that we can bring our kids along to as well. And it may not be great the first time, but kids are quite resilient, and they’ll learn to change too. And we can learn to change as well. So for every activity that you do with the kids for them, let’s try to think of an activity that we can bring them along on as well.

Mama, think of an activity or something that you want to do today that you can bring your kids along on the ride for too. And have a great day free of mama guilt because you deserve it.

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Meghan Q Barrett helps mamas figure their sh*t out so they can create a life they love as “mom” AND an individual without the mom guilt.

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